Try repeating over and over, “I accept this moment.”
“I accept the tensing of my muscles.”
“I accept that I don’t feel pleasure right now.”
“I accept this fantasy.”
Start there. See what untangles
Articles
on sexuality, empowerment, and self-growth
It wasn’t until I did work around my childhood wounding and patterning that I began having aha moments. I realized I was the common denominator of all these relationships, and if they were all going the same way, it pointed to a certain someone fucking up: me.
Anything you’re trying to change in your life: a body part, a reaction, a state of being, an emotion, a disease—try a new tact, a different angle. Baby it. Ask it what it needs from you, and if it’s in your power, provide that. It might need rest or love. It might simply need to be heard. What it doesn’t need is shame, judgment, or fear.
Breast massage gives you a relationship with your breasts, one that you cultivate from the inside out. This is your time to connect with your heart, with your nipples, and with any sensations or numbness there. This is your time to connect with the energy in your breasts, to give them acceptance and love, and to really make peace with them. Massaging your breasts leads to acceptance and compassion—and fuller, perkier breasts are the cherry on top.
Above all, a healthy sexuality isn’t boring—it can take you to greater heights of pleasure than you've ever experienced. When your sexuality is aligned in your own Truth, it doesn't come with feeling bad after sex or self-pleasure. It feels pure, unfettered and clean, but not in the way we're used to using those words. You can still be having anal sex, or exploring spanking, and feel pure, unfettered and clean. It's about full consent from you and a partner, and being your full Self in sex.
I have been so focused on money and scarcity for the past nine months.How to heal the money story I've inherited from the culture and my ancestors, how to move from scarcity into a space of thriving. I have felt so stuck in my patterns. So stuck in the worry about money, so stuck in the obsession and the frustration that there isn't more flow.
And now, it has finally settled. Finally clicked. The scarcity is within.
Originally published July 2017.
Those of us who have struggled with body dysmorphia or body hatred know that there's no easy way to describe the journey to body-acceptance. Still, I desperately want to be able to relate it to other women, because there is nothing more healing and powerful than being able to relax into who you are.
Imagine spending all the time you spend hating yourself and your body ... on something else. On hiking, or meditating. On getting a PhD, because it takes that kind of time and energy to keep up with the constant self-berating and shame.
Originally published July 15, 2017.
Many women (and men, I'm sure) who identify as highly sexual have a bit of a problem.
I'm just going to call it as I see it, as I used to be this way as well.
Those of us who identify as highly sexual tend to leak our sexual energy all over everyone we see. We walk into a room, we survey for potential lovers, and we hone in on making them ours, no matter the cost, no matter who might be waiting for them at home.
Originally published July 2017.
Usually I post blogs after I have the answer, but right now I don't. I have exhaustion, reactionary tendencies, and deep fears. All the human shit. All the fertilizer for the next beautiful upswing, which I will welcome with open arms. But for now, struggle. For now, a bath and cuddles with the dog. For now, I sit still, looking to the silence and the mystery for answers unspoken.
Originally published June 2017.